Liesl Garner

A Laughter worth every Dirty Sock



Posted: Monday, November 15, 2010

by Liesl Garner

What a gift this holiday season has been to me so far! The part of Thanksgiving I treasure the most was the evening I sat around the dining room table with my 14-year old son, a 14-year old nephew, an 18-year old niece and her boyfriend - playing Balderdash and laughing so hard that we all ended up with headaches. Watching my son cracking up at something I'd written, shaking his head, wiping tears out of his eyes and smiling from ear to ear was worth every dirty sock I've ever picked up off his floor, every time I've had to remind him to brush his teeth, every moment of frustration during his early teens.

Everything was washed away in that moment of laughter - the kind of laughter that actually makes you tired, leaving everyone breathing heavily and just trying to catch their breath. Not everyone can become this unglued over a board game, I realize. I guess this year, I'm especially thankful that I was raised in a family where playing games was a bonding experience - where shared laughter gave us memories to hold us together during tougher times.

One of my fondest Christmas memories was also one of our families bleakest. We were just little kids, and my mom gathered us around to tell us that we needed to pray for our Daddy. He was very sick, and he was never sick. She told us, through tears, that this year, there wouldn't be any presents because all we really wanted was for him to get better. I don't remember anything else except four little girls huddling with my mother on our big green couch, and crying and praying for a miracle.

Right at that moment, a friend of my fathers, knocked loudly on the door. He was wearing a Santa hat and carrying a box full of presents. Trailing behind him was a merry group of soldiers from the Army base where my father worked as a minister. News had traveled that we were in trouble, and the guys knew we needed some cheer.

With all the hoopla, even my dad, wrapped in a blanket to keep warm, came down and sat in front of a roaring fire in our den to watch his children be entertained by good Samaritans. The presents were unwrapped, and we girls opened packages to find a doll each and four board games. I remember one sister received the classic game, Operation, and there was a big crowd of guys all hunched over that little guy trying to tweeze organs out of tiny openings without ringing the bell.

In another corner of the room, a crowd was playing Tic-Tac-Toe Toss with sand bags into a 3-story, 3-room per floor miniature building. The Twister map was laid out and people were falling all over each other to land their left hand on a yellow spot, and their right foot on a green. And in the loudest part of the room, a rousing game of Pit was being hollered - as the stock market trading floor was reenacted by pushy people trying to out-yell one another and score the perfect "Corner on the Market!"

What is odd to me is that I don't even remember what sickness my father was suffering under - or if we were ever told. He got better. I just remember an evening of laughter and happiness, where there had been sadness and fear only moments before. I cry every single time I watch the holiday classic, "It's a Wonderful Life," because we were on the receiving end, as little children, of that sort of outpouring of love. It didn't take much. There were no expensive toys - there were just priceless moments of friendship and fun given by young men who knew that a family was having a rough time. They gave their time and their attention to little children who needed to laugh.

A few years ago, I got to repay the gesture. My Girl's Night Out group heard about a family who had lost their home in a fire. We got the sizes of each of the children in the family, and split up their needs among us. We filled a car full of clothing, warm blankets, toys, soft-snuggly-teddy-bears, shoes, you name it and brought our contributions to the maternal grandmother who had taken her family in to live with her. Within a week, we received probably the most beautiful Christmas card I have ever seen - designed, colored, and written by three little girls we'd never met, who joyfully and exuberantly thanked us for all the laughter and tears of happiness we had given them.

When I think of all the things, and lists of things, and lists of all the lists we are trying to manage at this time of year, I wonder how any of us are able to keep any holiday spirit. These things threaten to steal our joy of giving, because we start to get trapped in a spirit of obligatory giving. In my youngest sister's kitchen hangs a sign, which reads, "The most important things in life aren't things," and I pause to let that sink in until I can remember what it means.

This year, I hope we all are able to be still for a moment and remember a priceless joy - a thing about the holidays that stirs our hearts, that isn't really a thing at all, but a feeling, a tradition shared, a favorite story, a favorite game, a bit of wassail or cider with a friend, or the smile on a child's face because we took a moment to hug or wipe away a tear. This year, in the act of caring for someone who desperately needs some care, I hope we all get to feel the unspeakable joy that comes with reaching our hand out and realizing we've just given someone a lifeline. This year, I hope we are able to take the time to play a game with a teenager, until the strong silent facade is broken, and laughter is bursting out of their every seam.

(This article was originally published by the Clovis Unified School District newspaper, the CUSD Today, in December 2006.)
Liesl Garner has many articles on Wryte Stuff from back in the day when she wrote about Beauty from unusual perspectives. Today, she is a working mom who is starting a ridiculous gardening project. She writes about that at Green Acres-ISH.

She also writes to be writing, because writing is what she does for balance. Those articles can be found at Impulse to Write.

Liesl has been out of touch with the writing community for a little over a year - and looking forward to reconnecting with the fantastic writers here!!

When not working, she chases a husband and 4 boys around, trying to keep up with their art and their antics.
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Top-level comments on this article: (4 total)
» left by David Pekrul
1 year 189 days ago.
70 fans.
Excellent write; just in time for the Christmas Season. Thank you.
» left by Liesl Garner 1 year 189 days ago.
11 fans. Follow Liesl Garner on twitter!
Thank you, David! I appreciate you reading it and commenting!! Have a wonderful holiday season!
» left by Jennifer Stewart
1 year 189 days ago.
153 fans.
I'm so glad your father got better, and what a wonderful thing you and your friends did. I can imagine what it must have been like for that family to get your gifts. Christmas can be such a magical time, especially if love is the main thing.
» left by Liesl Garner 1 year 186 days ago.
11 fans. Follow Liesl Garner on twitter!
Thank you, Jennifer. Sorry it's taken me so long to respond. I have been away from the computer for a couple of days. I love the holidays too. Memories of fun, simple things are often the best parts, aren't they?
» left by George Stay
1 year 187 days ago.
22 fans.
Thank you for sharing this and for reminding us all what the holidays are all about. I pray this year that your holidays will be especially memorable and filled with the laughter that takes your breath away.
» left by Liesl Garner 1 year 186 days ago.
11 fans. Follow Liesl Garner on twitter!
I want the laughter that takes my breath away too! Good times, for sure! Thank you so much for your comment!
» left by Brianna Popsickle
1 year 187 days ago.
121 fans.
Wonderful article Liesl. I've had such laughs. My kids refer to it as a gut laugh. They'll say, "Oh, no here comes one of mom's gut laughs.' There's nothing quite like it. Thanks for sharing your story. I hope we all remember to pay it forward this holiday season as well.
» left by Liesl Garner 1 year 186 days ago.
11 fans. Follow Liesl Garner on twitter!
Thank you, Brianna! There is something incredibly healthy about laughing that hard, don't you think? It completely rejuvenates your whole being! I think I need a laugh riot today. I'll have to go tickle my kids and see if we don't collapse into a torrent of laughter together! Sounds awesome!
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